Cavan Biggio is caught between a rock and a hard place (forgive the cliche)

Hello Cavan,

I was thinking about you recently. You haven’t been getting a lot of playing time. Just 15 appearances out of 25 games, as of April 27. So sorry to bring it up.

Looked over your stats thus far. You’re likely your own worst critic; so, no need to add more salt to the wound. But that three-run bomb you hit against the White Sox a few days ago reminded EVERYONE of what you are capable of. You needed that. We all needed that.

I wonder what’s going through your mind when you sit in the dugout. You’re likely just focusing on the match, going through scenarios and staying loose.

But maybe there are demons causing trouble in your mind.

Those fucking demons, Cavan. Relentless and dominant. I have my own, but this isn’t about me. It’s about the poison yours could be feeding you.

The pressure to succeed might weigh heavily: Son of a Hall of Famer, teammates with famous baseball fathers living up to their potential, you’re strong showing in ’19 and ’20.

Whether you’re feeling it or not, you’re dealing with it. You’re getting out of bed, showing up and working. You do it all over again the next day, even when you’re not in the lineup and spend an entire game on the bench. This kind of stress would easily break a civilian.

Then there’s social media.

Insiders, outsiders, passionate and compassionate; all with opinions. Some are fair and constructive, while others don’t care how harsh their critiques are.

It’s a lethal tag team – mental demons and the keyboard columnists. Powerful to knock down giants. You certainly encounter it more than I do.

You already know this, Cavan, but I still want to express it:

You’re stronger than those demons, Cavan. They’re harmless, especially when you tell them to fuck off.

And the best way to say “fuck off” is through character.

Never stop showing up. Never stop working. Never stop grinding.

Even if they send you to Buffalo, trade you to Oakland or consider you the 26th player, never stop. Everyone has an important role, even the supporting cast members.

This might help, Cavan: Travis Snider was on a Toronto-themed podcast and talked about all the struggles he went through. If he could handle all those demons and last as long as he did, so can you.

Hang in there, Cavan. Your stats don’t define who you are.

Obviously, you don’t need me telling you that.

ER

One of my biggest regrets as a Blue Jays fan: Never saw a game at Exhibition Stadium

Exhibition Stadium doesn’t exist anymore.

It passed away at the end of the 20th century; replaced with a parking lot and BMO Field. For years, it was home to the Blue Jays, Argonauts, the Blizzard, wrestling cards, concerts and many other events.

It had flaws; many flaws. It wasn’t called the “Mistake By The Lake” out of love. Spectators screaming “WE WANT A DOME” during the 1982 Grey Cup weren’t doing it for whimsical joy.

The venue is missed because of the memories and nostalgia, but it’s not as celebrated and maintained as Maple Leaf Gardens.

I certainly miss it, but only because of an absent experience.

The square on my Blue Jays bingo card that reads “saw a game at Exhibition Stadium” will forever be blanked. Never saw a match or enjoyed the elements that didn’t crossover to SkyDome.

I was born in the early 80s and didn’t develop any awareness of the Jays until after they left the grounds of Exhibition Place.

Didn’t witness the 80s Jays in the moment. Never saw Dave Stieb or Tony Fernandez in their prime. Never witnessed the “Greatest Outfield in Baseball.” Couldn’t cry tears of joy during “The Drive ’85” or tears of pain after the collapse in 1987. Never watched the seagulls prepare for their post-game feast.

I can only imagine what the experience was like:

Taking the subway to Union Station, clutching my ticket that I purchased with help from my local Dominion grocery store.

Transferring to the streetcar, passing by the Princes’ Gates and arriving at the TTC loop. Walking up to the stadium and feeling the breeze off of Lake Ontario.

Get to my seat and take everything in – the blue seats, the grey benches, the lime green Astroturf. Maybe it’s spring or fall and I’m dressed in layers. Maybe it’s summer and I’ve dressed accordingly, thanking God it didn’t rain.

Exhibition Stadium was a quirky baseball park. Truthfully, it wasn’t designed for baseball. The structure’s configuration was for football. This was obvious when looking at the grandstand seating area, which played the role of outfield seats.

Left field seats were right up against the outfield wall and moved diagonally towards centerfield, which had a gap between the seats and the wall.

And that’s where it ended. There weren’t any right field seats. Just open space and the big scoreboard. Just imagine a nighttime home run ball disappearing into the dark abyss.

During its final decade, I did manage to walk in and around the facility on two occasions. One time – during the CNE – a friend and I explored the building.

We ducked in and out of a few section entrances, much to my parents’ chagrin. We walked underneath the press box area and even found an elevator that still worked.

Since then, I’ve also attended a few sporting events at BMO Field. From a weather standpoint, I got a sense of what it was like at Exhibition Stadium. However, it hardly replicated what I missed out on.

And it seems some fans have missed out on the stadium’s relevance to Toronto’s baseball history.

SkyDome was built because people were tired of being cold and wet while watching games at Exhibition Stadium. Unless it was sunny and 25’C, the setting was miserable. For all the criticism SkyDome has received – justified in certain cases – inclement weather is never an issue.

It’s always annoying when the Jays’ current home is harshly criticized. Hopefully, the renovations will change that sentiment. But there will always be fans who bemoan that the dome doesn’t match the current trends for ballparks.

It’s also frustrating because those fans are either ignorant or ignore where the Jays used to play. Had they known, the tone would be different.

For all its glaring warts, Exhibition Stadium was where the Blue Jays took their first steps, solidified their roots and had their first taste of success.

Was it as prestigious as Wrigley Field, Fenway Park or the original Yankee Stadium? Of course not! But it had character; traits that make fans look back at all the warts fondly.

And I wish I could have experienced it.

ER